The Unforeseen Butterfly
by NikCul
Summary: Edward's the idiot while Bella's the hopeless romantic. Their lives crossed years ago when they became best friends. If only Edward wasn't an idiot & Bella wasn't hopeless, does that mean that fate had a little bit more planned for them than just friends?
1. Chapter 1

_**Just because I have another new story does not mean I am abandoning my others. This story is more of a helping hand to concur my writers block. Enjoy!**_

Summary: Edward's the oblivious idiot while Bella's the shy, hopeless romantic. Fate made their lives cross years ago when they became best friends instantly. If only Edward wasn't an idiot & Bella wasn't hopeless, does that mean that fate had a little bit more planned for them than just friends? All Human.

Chapter One

"It's late." I whispered. "Go home, Edward."

You're so strict Bella. He chuckled, leaning away from my cushioned bed frame and getting up from my bed, brushing his socked feet against the wooded floor as he swiftly walked to my window, two stories above the ground.

Edward Cullen. No words could describe him. Even if I tried, where do I begin? Was it with his perfect face? The disarray of bronze hair nesting on top of it? The perfect distance his eyes were from his nose? The sweet strawberry lips or the edged jaw position right above his rounded chin? Maybe it wasn't even his looks or the fact that his pale body didn't have a week bone. But maybe it was who he was. Edward Cullen continued to surprise me. He wasn't cocky, he was sympathetic. The words egotistical and sleazy didn't even exist in his vocabulary because not even our naked eyes could think of him eligible to be such a man whore! Excuse my French. As for the word perfect, it may not exist in your world but when you dealing with Edward Cullen's, perfect isn't even perfect enough to describe him. He's legendary, a leader of the free world and yet, he's still the oblivious idiot he will always be despite his A average.

I have more than just a crush on my best friend. Maybe it's time to see a therapist or maybe that ship has sailed already.

Of course it has. Nothing can heal the pain I face everyday watching his suck the face off of the absent-minded, dumb bitch, who's name I can recall but I'd rather just call her a life Ruiner.

Tanya Denali can go to hell.

She seems nice and all and I know her intention isn't really to make my life miserable but why do people have to be so stupid these days? Can't she see the way I look at him? I only look at myself in a mirror once a day and I can even see it! How is it possible that she doesn't? Maybe she's too busy looking at herself in the mirror three hundred times a day.

Is it too much to ask for a little luck in my life? My parents are divorced, I've never been kissed, my best friend is in love with Life Ruiner, my dad works twenty four seven and I live in Forks. I didn't think it was possible for such a small town to exist! If it wasn't for Edward, I'd be soaking up the sun in sunny Arizona. Infatuation can do weird things to people.

I say infatuation because I can't know if I actually feel something legitiment for Edward or if it really is just a crush or maybe even lust although I doubt it. I just wish that whatever it was, he felt it too.

But of course, Edward Cullen is just an oblivious idiot.

"I'll see you tomorrow. But before I do, can I ask of one favor?"

"Depends."

"Can you pick Tanya up for me? My Volvo is in the shop to I'm riding with Alice and we all know how Alice feels about Tanya."

Alice was Edward's sister. She tremendously hated Tanya and thought she was completely wrong for Edward. So did I.

Actually, I may have to contradict what I just said. Tanya seems perfect. Blond hair, long, smooth legs, bigger in the chest area, and kinda fun, I guess. She can keep him happy.

And me? What can I do? My dull brown hair looks the same everyday matching my mud brown eyes. I feel like my nose comes out too far and is huge for my petite face and maybe the reason I haven't had a first kiss is because my stupid chapped lips lie awkwardly on my face.

So you see my dilemma. Can someone agree when I say I feel I'm too young for a _mid-life_ crisis?

"Sure." I answered. Was was I supposed to say? 'No, what if she's bisexual?'

"Thanks. See ya." He said smiling as he jumped out of my window like always.

And every night I go to bed thinking the same exact thing: Why am I not good enough?

_**I know this one is a short chapter but its more of a prologue. The others will be more or less 1500 -2000 words :)**_

**_Thanks and please review._**

**_xoxoxo_**

**_loving you_**

**_NikCul_**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

I felt like I was the nerdy girl in the movie with no friends, with the crappy frizzy hair and braces that never seem to actually do any work. (Thankfully, I don't). In this movie, I was waiting in the driveway for the popular girl and as she walked out in her jean mini skirt and a revealing tank top while the 'sexy' music played in the background as she walked in slow motion. Her hair bounced heavily as she strode down the driveway, her long legs taking large glides while her heels clicked endlessly towards my red Chevy.

In this movie, Tanya Denali had everything. She was rich, beautiful, dating the 'hottie' of the school and never seemed to be awkward in any way.

I was the nerd who envied her.

She opened the rusty door leading her into the passenger seat and sat down, flipping her hair out of her face and putting on the creaky seat belt with her recently French manicured nails.

"Thanks for picking me up!" She exclaimed. "I mean, your no Eddie but your kinda cute when you don't hide your face with that hair of yours."

I nodded, trying not to tell her that Edward hates that nickname and began driving to the school while Tanya prattled about her and Edward.

"I mean, Bells, your his best friend, do you think he's gay? I mean, like, am I not attractive? Every guy wants all this!" She complained, staring down at her body. "I mean, come on Bells, like, if you were a dude would you get with me?"

No comment.

"Oh my gosh! I'm not sexy anymore? No wonder Eddie won't seduce me! Why won't he? I'm cute!" And then, she started screaming.

Someone please shoot me.

"You're really pretty Tanya. Don't be self-conscience. I'd kill for your looks." I said, to make her stop her yelling.

"Really Bells?"

"Really." It was the truth.

By that time, we'd arrived at Forks High School and the moment Tanya stepped out of the car, she hunted with her ice blue eyes for Edward. As soon as she spotted him, we were back in the movie as I pictured their slow motion run to embrace each other, or in their case...something a little more physical and vile that I had to look away.

"Hey." I heard Alice's airy, belled voice greet me.

"Hi Alice." I smiled, hugging her small body.

In the Movie, Alice was the fashionable one. Not necessarily popular but everyone still wanted her advice, to be her friend and talk to her to feel special. But what none of those girls will ever realize is that Alice has a heart of gold underneath all that Prada and Gucci.

Her hair was black, short and spiked around her small face. Her hazel eyes held trust while her nose was small and titled upwards. Her lips were tiny but when you get her talking, you may never get her to shut up.

"So how was driving..._that_...to school."

"Alice, she isn't that bad when she's alone with you..."

"Really?"

"Really. We actually had a decent conversation."

"Let me guess, that conversation consisted of the words sexy, Edward and her loud screaming."

"No." I lied.

She rolled her eyes and glanced back at the happy couple walking hand in hand towards first period. "Come on, let's get to class."

/

"I mean, he's dead so, like, why do we have to learn him again and again? He's not, like, gonna come back and say thanks." Tanya complained to Alice and I during English.

"But his writing is legendary and romantic." I told her.

"Yeah...if you know what he's saying." She fought, chewing her bubble gum.

I turned away from Tanya's blowing and back to Alice. "I give up."

"I honestly don't know why you at least try to tolerate her. I can tell you don't actually like her."

"I do like her Alice."

"You keep telling yourself that but the only reason you actually try to like her is for Edward."

"You're being melodramatic." I said.

"I am not. You would never ever take a second to try and be friends with someone who still thinks a period is something that comes at the end of a sentence."

"Technically it is."

"When you're five." She argued. "Face it, you only pretend to like her so Edward will praise you more. Maybe even give you a pat on the back."

"We are not having this conversation." I hissed.

"You like my brother."

"Alice..."

"Admit it. You do and you should tell him. If you don't, you'll continue wondering 'what if' when you're thirty years old living with twenty cats, crying yourself to sleep while watching reruns of old soap operas from the thirties calling me at 2:30am saying 'why didn't I listen to your advice in eleventh grade'. You are afraid that Edward won't like you back and sometimes I have to agree with you because if you are going to sit around reading Shakespeare being the shy person you are I don't know why the hell he would even like you back!" She yelled at me.

Like in the movies, the bell rang at the perfect time. Dismissing me from English class where the bathroom welcomed my tears.

_**I hope you guys liked it! Don't worry, it'll continue to build :)**_

**_loving you_**

**_xoxoxo_**

**_NikCul_**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

"Bells, are you sure you're not hungry? If you're not feeling good, you should at least eat a little something."

There was Charlie, my over protective dad trying to be the ideal father. He was the Chief of Police here in Forks so he only came home so late but when I called him after first period to tell him I wasn't feeling good, he rushed over to school to pick me up, take me home and tuck me into bed.

I have officially spent thirteen hours in bed. I got home at ten in the morning, and it is eleven now...in the evening. I feel bloated and can't seem to fall asleep.

"Dad, I'm fine. You should get to sleep, it's late." I called to him through my creaky door.

"Alright Baby, I love you."

"Love you." I uttered back lightly.

As soon as I heard the descending tap of his feet I sighed. Today hadn't been the best day of my life and I had a feeling the day was still going down hill. What could happen in one hour?

As soon as I asked myself that question, the blaring vibrations my phone caused in the late evening went off on my nightstand.

I knew it only took Charlie seconds to fall asleep and I didn't want to wake him so I quickly grabbed the phone from the night table and pressed talk, waiting for Alice's voice to ring through the speaker.

"Bella! You picked up!" She exclaimed.

"Umm...yeah."

"Look, I just really wanted to apologize for what I said earlier. If you really do like Tanya for...who she is...then that's okay and I won't judge you."

"Al, it wasn't that." I murmured. "But, do you honestly think that I'll end up a cat lady?"

She giggled lightly. "No. I was on a rampage and needed to take my anger out on someone."

"Care to share Ms. Brandon?"

"It's Edward."

"What about him?" I asked.

"I know you're friends with Tanya and all but that girl has got him brainwashed! She's all he thinks about all the time. If it wasn't bad about hearing her shriek about Shakespeare's mustache, wait until you here the jabber of her lips from Eddie. It's non-stop."

"I don't understand what you mean..."

"He likes her for her looks and he _knows _himself that he doesn't actually love her, it's lust yet he continues to suck the expensive lip stick off her flesh."

"So then why is he with her?"

"I'm not a dude! All I can answer is that guys are weird."

"I don't get why you're even telling me this."

"I don't get how you are acting so calmly!" She chuckled.

"How should I be acting?"

"Umm...jealous?"

"Don't start with me..."

I pictured her raising her hands in surrender. "Okay! But one day you'll come clean." I could almost hear her smirk. "Goodnight Bella."

"Night Alice." I mumbled and hung up the phone, turned it off and set it back down on the nightstand.

Edward wasn't going to come tonight. If he was, he would have been here by now.

~/~/~/~

My crispy eyes fluttered open on the bright Saturday morning only to have me hyperventilating in bed.

"What are you doing here?" I shouted, gasping from the sudden shock.

"Sorry! Your father let me in."

"Charlie leaves at five in the morning. You've been here since then?"

"I'm your mother." Renee contradicted.

"Still! That is just _creepy_."

She laughed lightly. "Good morning Bella."

"Hi mom."

Renee Swan. Dating Phil Dwyer as of five years. The light brown hair, the soft wrinkles around her blue eyes and the thin line her lips created. That was my mom for you. Skinny as hell but one hell of a mother.

She came and sat on the bed and put her thin arms around me. "Now, after you brush your teeth and get ready, I'm taking you out for a nice mother and daughter day."

"What brought this on?" I questioned.

"We'll talk later."

"Okay. And you will explain the reason from traveling all the way from Arizona to come have some mother and daughter time." I said. "Come on, we have phones for that stuff. Spit it out."

"Isabella. Get dressed and we'll go out."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine."

~/~/~/~/~

"Married?"

"Yes, to Phil."

"Okay? It's about time. You've been seeing him for what? Five years now?"

"I wasn't sure how you'd take it."

"You know I've been nothing but supportive about your relationship. I can't believe you think that I would take it any differently." I told her. "When is it?"

"Three weeks. We wanted it as soon as possible and we just set the date two days ago."

"Why didn't you just call?"

"Because I'm having the wedding down in Seattle. Phil is already staying at the hotel down there and a couple of our family friends are coming in. I just wanted you here and didn't want to have to take you away from school."

I wanted to say: 'Trust me, there is nothing more I'd want then to get of that hell hole' but chose against it.

"That's great mom." I grinned.

"You can bring all your friends and I'd love to mean that boyfriend of yours."

"Now you're joking." I murmured.

"Oh come on, Edward still hasn't hit on you?" She giggled at her own joke but it wasn't really funny.

"You know what, I'll be sure to invite Edward and his _girlfriend_."

"Oh sweetie...I'm sorry, I didn't know." She apologized.

"Mom, I'm seventeen, I can handle it."

"I can't believe that he has a girlfriend." She gasped.

"Well believe it because it's true."

"I'm sorry Baby..."

"I'm fine." I jerked, getting up from my seat in the Ice-Cream shop and walking outside to the cool breeze. Of course she followed.

"Look, I've got to get going so give Edward my love along with Alice and everyone else. Okay?"

"Yeah." I sighed.

Renee drove me home and the car ride was silent. I stayed put until it was time to leave her, kissed her goodbye and went home to capture myself in another sleep. I could use it.

_**I hope you liked itttt...**_

_**anyways...R&R**_

_**loving you**_

_**xoxoxo**_

_**NikCul  
**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**hi! thanks to all of you that reviewed...(two people) but thats okay!**_

_**here you goo...**_

Chapter Four

"So mom's in town." I mumbled to Charlie across the shabby kitchen table.

"I know." He uttered back, sticking a watt of fish in his mouth.

"How do you feel about them getting married?" I asked.

"I'm happy for your mom, she deserves it."

"That's good." I nodded, finishing my salad and putting the plate in the dishwasher.

"I'm gonna go finish my homework." I stated.

"I'll go watch the game when I'm done."

"Okay."

And that was just another awkward evening with Charlie.

As soon as I got upstairs, I emptied my English book out of my backpack and set it on my desk, flipping the unit to Shakespeare and then making myself comfortable.

This was the fifth time I was studying Romeo and Juliet and could practically recite the book by heart. The task was to write an Essay on how unrequited love was shown in this novel and I figured I'd just recycle mine from two years ago, maybe edit it and make it more mature.

By the time I was done that, it was nine thirty and I had nothing to do.

Alice's ring tone on my phone solved my problem.

"Hey Alice." I answered automatically.

"Actually, it's Tanya."

I froze.

"Tanya? What are you doing using Alice's phone?"

"I'm at Edward's and wanted to call you but Eddie wouldn't let me use his phone so he gave me Alice's." She exclaimed. "So what's, like, up girlie?"

"Umm...nothing really. Why...?"

"I was, like, wondering if you wanted to hang out tomorrow afternoon, just, like, the two of us."

"Umm...sure."

"Great! Anyways, I got to go. I need to spend as much time with Edward as I can before I leave his house."

I let out the breathe I'd been holding, thankful that she wasn't staying the night.

"Okay...see you tomorrow."

"I call you in the morning Bells!" And then she hung up.

I sighed and put my phone down on the nightstand and fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

~/~/~/~/~

"I'm so glad we get to hang today! I've been wanting to get to know you, for like, ever! Edward talks about you so much!"

"Good things, I hope."

"Duh!" She smiled. "So tell me about yourself."

And there I was, telling Tanya Denali, only parts of my life's story in McDonald's, in the mall, in Port Angeles.

"OMG! You're an only child? So am I!"

Sure she was a little talkative it's almost stalkerish and yes, her vocabulary is extremely limited but her heart's in the right place. As much as I would enjoy disliking her, there was no way it was possible. She was perfect for Edward. They say opposites attract, right?

"I'm totally sorry about the whole divorce thing. I completely know how you feel but I have the worse end. My dad is on his, like, eighth wife. She's probably three years older than I am. He barely, like, ever visits and when he does, he gives me jewelry thinking that fixes it but it doesn't. My mom is a drunk slut and then there is me. Some people, like, think I live upper class but in reality, I'd totally kil for your life Bells Swan."

Then it suddenly dawned on me that Tanya really wasn't as perfect as she comes across as. But then again, she has one thing I don't have. Would I swich lives with her to have it?

"And then, there is Eddie." She sighed. "He makes me feel so alive but I feel as though it isn't enough in a way. Sure I really like him, but think about it, there is only two ways to go in a relationship. You either marry the guy, or break up with him. I see Edward as the high school hottie, the guy to keep me busy during my years as a teenager, someone to lean on but I can't see myself having a family with him. Like, at first I could but then he talks about you, Bells and it's clear I am only there to do one thing."

"What do you mean Tanya?" Where was she getting at?

"I'm jealous of you Bella and I think you should give Edward a chance."

"A chance?" I confirmed.

She nodded her head. "Yeah, like, a chance."

"For...?"

"I'm not completes sure." She shrugged. "I just know that you guys are perfect for each other."

"So then why are you with him?" I asked.

"In reality, I'd probably go for someone like James or Laurent at our school."

"Didn't you go out with both of them already?"

In my school, the more popular guys who could pass for 'hot jocks' were James and Laurent. James has baby blue eyes and dirty blond hair, your stereotypical 'hot jock' and 'hottest popular guy because of his rare genes'. He seems okay I guess.

And then there was Laurent. The complete opposite. He had chocolate skin, deep chocolate eyes and a black haired boy cut. He was extremely fit and was the best friend of James.

"Yes. I was with James for about a year and a half and, like, you probably remember because everyone does and, like, I was totally in love with him and then he broke up with me, never even giving me a reason as to why and I was, like, so heartbroken so I tried to make him jealous. A couple days later I began dating Laurent and my dad, this was during his single stage after he'd just broken up with his fifth wife, was in town and was, like, totally concerned so he made me break up with him but I refused, getting revenge on him too by sleeping around with a bunch of guys that he'd walk in on it. Eventually he, like, put his foot down and took me on an 'intervention weekend'. By the end of that I was totally done with everything, feeling so guilty and broke up with Laurent, even though I was going to anyways because James was apparently dating some goodie-two-shoes from his Spanish class, and, like, that was when my dad introduced me to Edward. I wanted my dad to just love me again _so _badly so I dove head first for Edward, trying to change who I was to have my dad back! And look at him, he's with his eighth wife somewhere in Europe! If I could go back in time, I still wouldn't change anything though because having James, someone who at least seemed to care for me for quite some time, over my dad was the best thing I could have. I just want him back now over anything I have."

Tanya _was_ tortured and I felt bad for her. From the way she presents herself, I would have never guessed this was her background story.

"Does Edward know all of this?"

"No, you're the only one. Not even Lauren or Jessica know and they are my best friends! I can't tell them this because it will make Lauren feel superior about herself when she's nothing but I dumb bitch and Jessica will just spread it to the whole world. You are the only one I can trust."

"Thanks." I think.

"I just don't know what to do Bells. I'm tired of pretending I feel something more for Edward than just a good friend. He is the sweetest and nicest guy ever but he's not James."

"Do you have the slightest idea of what you want to do?"

"I want to be myself again. I want a sober mom, a single dad, two friends I can tell secrets to, and most of all, I want James."

"How are you going to do it?"

"I need your help. Edward is my friend and I need to keep it that way. Do you know how he feels about me?"

"You'd have to ask him that yourself, Tanya. I know nothing."

"Okay, Bells."

"Bella." I corrected.

"Sorry."

"That's okay." I paused. "Are you going to break up with him?"

"As soon as possible."

"What are you going to do about James?"

"I'll confront him when the time is right. But for now, I need to be single." She chuckled.

"I wish you the best of luck Tanya."

"You too Bella."

And then she walked away, out of McDonald's, swinging her hips in her short mini skirt and tight tank top.


	5. Chapter 5

**_heyy...sorry it's been a little while but here I am again...enjoy everybodyyy_**

Chapter 5

"I can't believe she just used my phone like that _and _you actually agreed to meet her!" Alice rolled her eyes.

After Tanya left, I called up Alice to come to the mall knowing she wouldn't refuse, despite her surprised reactions to find me here willingly. Malls were the last place I came to. I just needed to talk to her about the whole Tanya and Edward situation. I was being vague though, of course. These things were personal for Tanya and I'm sure Alice is the last person she wanted to know.

"Look Ali, I'm telling you, she's not so bad." I defended.

"What did you even talk about? Boob jobs and lip pumpers." She chuckled to herself.

"Actually, we talked about your brother which is why I called you up. Thought you might be interested in hearing her side of the story." I bargained.

"What do you mean?"

"The girl is a saint, Alice. All she wants is for her dad to love her and her old boyfriend."

"Laurent or James or is there someone else?" She spat disapprovingly.

"James. So only went out with Laurent to get James back and to defy her dad. It's a long story but apparently Edward was the one way her dad wouldn't think of her as such a sin."

"So she used Edward for her dad's approval?"

"In a way. Her dad recommended Edward and when she thought about how it could get her dad back she took the opportunity but the she realized that if her dad doesn't love her for who she is, why should she try and change. She is now going to break up with Edward and try to get James back."

"Do we tell Edward?" Alice questioned.

"No. Let her do all the talking."

"So when they break up..." I didn't have to hear the rest of that sentence to know she was talking about Edward and I...together.

"Alice...are you really going to start again. If he wanted me, he would have dumped Tanya and came to me a long time ago. Now that she is dumping him, he definitely won't want me."

"You don't know that!" She exclaimed. "Gosh, you're such a pessimist."

"I am not." I urged as we walked up to a Baskin Robbin's and I ordered a Gold Metal Ribbon while Alice ordered Vanilla. "I just don't like getting my hopes up to be let down."

I handed the girl exact change, then she handed me over my ice cream as well as Alice's.

We sat down at a nearby table with a bunch of sticky rings from cups around the edges of it along with salt from various fast food restaurants. Those places have infinite amounts of calories which should make them illegal. Ir's disgusting.

"Look Bella, I wouldn't lie to you. I just have this weird feeling that your hopes won't get let down. Like a six sense."

"With you, I find it hard to believe I'm in eleventh grade." I mumbled.

"Ha ha, very funny."

"What about you and Jasper, huh? You don't see me nagging about it all the time."

Jasper Whitlock was Edward's other best friend. The only difference between me and Jazz was the fact that they could talk about sports and sex while we talked about the good old times and his emotional relationship rather than physical. Jasper has medium length blond locks and a sharp nose with a soft chin. His family moved here about three years ago from Texas and him and Alice had an immediate connection. They both claim they are "just friends" but I find that hard to believe. They have been on more dates then all the couples at our school combined but tell us those "dates" are just casual outings to movies or informal restaurants.

"We're just friends." She said softly.

"Oh really? Wow, I find that hard to believe."

"What's that supposed to mean?" She hissed.

"Well, it's just that, I didn't know friends kissed each other. Edward and I don't." Although I wish we did.

"Where did you here that?" She shouted.

"So you admit it?" I asked casually.

"Bella." She sighed sternly.

"Okay, okay." I surrendered. "Edward's room has a great view to the porch." I smiled eveily.

"That bastard."

I laughed lightly. "Alice, come on. The guy obviously likes you and neither of you have anything standing in your way like a girlfriend or soon to be ex-girlfriend or unrequited love."

"So what are you saying?"

"I am saying that you are Alice Mary Brandon. Take a chance and ask him out just because the guy doesn't have the guts to!"

"He did initiate the kiss." She defended.

"Stop defending him and go be with him!"

"You know what Isabella, you are right." She smiled, got up, tossed her finished ice-cream cup into the garbage and waved back at me, skipping off to meet Jasper.

At least fate thinks I'm a good friend.

I sat back against the uncomfortable booth, eating the rest of my ice-cream in silence, playing with the soft caramel then sticking spoons of it into my mouth and letting it melts away before I heard someone slip into the booth across from me and sigh.

"Edward?" I inquired, surprised.

"Hey Bella." He sighed again.

"What's up?" I asked, uneasy.

"Tanya broke up with me."

"Oh." Well, I could say I didn't see that one coming but who am I kidding?

"And she explained why."

"Why...?"

"She told me the whole father thing and how she wants James back and everything. The same story she told you."

"Oh, I'm really sorry Edward that she used you like that."

"It's alright. I feel so bad for her though. We have to make it up to her."

"How? Call her father up and tell him how much of a jackass he is?" I snorted rhetorically, crossing my arms and leaning back again.

The glint in Edward's eye told me it was something close to that.

"Edward...no." I shook my head. "There is no way we are messing with her family. That is none of our business."

"Or we are not messing with her family. Just with James."

"Things happen for a reason. We can't decide fate, it has to decide itself and there is no way in hell I am helping you tamper with something that shouldn't be tampered with!"

"You are redundant when your defenseless."

Edward better thank his lucky stars that I am in love with him. The words impulsive and reckless have never been in my vocabulary.

Until now.

Along with seduction.

_**and there we have it...sorry to leave you hanging but I guess your just gunna have to read the next chapter to find out**_

_**I'll update soon!**_

**_xoxoxo_**

**_loving you_**

**_NikCul_**


	6. Chapter 6

_**here you goo my friends...**_

Chapter 6

No.

No.

No.

No.

Did I have to say it again?

Edward's idea of helping Tanya is completely out of my comfort zone. It doesn't even make sense to me! How can me being sexy lure someone to their ex. James broke up with Tanya! He didn't want her! So how the hell am I going to change that?

"I refuse." I said to Edward as he sat down on my bed with that delicious smirk on his edged face.

"Come on Bella, help out a friend. Don't you want what's best for her?"

"Of course I do but I will not go against my will and put what's left of my dignity on the line to do so." I jerked.

Edward chuckled and wrapped his lean arm around my petite waist and pulled me against his body on my bed. "Please."

"Edward..."

"Bella..." He mimicked.

"I can't." I complained, ducking my head into his shoulder blade.

"Why?"

"How do you think this sounds? 'Girls, let's all pretend to be strippers and lure a bunch of boys there and put on a couple shows and then eventually they'll want to come daily and then we put Tanya in there and all the guys ditch James and they get their 'freak on' while we celebrate our hard work for pole dancing!' Oh yeah, that speech is a real keeper."

"I think it's a good idea."

"That's because it's yours." I said.

"Just do it. Take a chance Bella. You're always too uptight. I'd like to see _you_ get your 'freak on'."

I rolled my eyes and thought about it. Edward hasn't really seen that kid of side of me. The side that can do something completely out of my daily routine.

"What would you have me do?" I gave in.

"Get everyone to agree." Edward grinned deviously.

Oh to joy.

Now let's shred it to pieces.

/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/

All the girls easily agreed, some of them giving me a little too much information like when Jessica Stanley and Rosalie Hale straight out said, and I quote "We have a lot of experience doing this kind of stuff. We do it every Saturday."

Just lovely.

"So name me all the girls you've got." Edward demanded.

"Umm...Jessica, Rosalie, Alice, Angela, Irina, Kate, Lauren, Heidi and Jane. You?"

"Well, obviously James and Laurent, Jasper, Emmett, Garrett, Tyler, Mike, Ben and Eric." He told me. "Now we just need a place. Do you think my house would work?"

"No offense Edward, but how do you think your parents would feel when you tell them you wanna host a strip party?"

"Bella, you think way to much. My parents go out every Friday, Saturday and Sunday and leave me and Alice home alone. You come over all the time when their not here." Edward sighed.

"So your house it is. Now what?"

"Well seeing as today is Sunday, invite all the girls over and they can all use Alice's things and she'll design your outfits and then I'll get the guys over here around eight and while you guys set up, I'll get Emmett and Jazz to help me set up the house to make it...slut like."

"Okay. I'll go get Alice and we'll get the girls over. See you at seven thirty?"

"Seven thirty it is."

I left Edward to do his part while me and all the girls got ready. Alice completely destroyed my hair, teased it and personally I thought it looked like a lion's mane. She then stuck me in these black leather, laced boots that reminded me of the ones Madonna wore in her "Like a Virgin" music video and pinned me into really short black booties and a leather button vest where my cleavage (or what I have of it) felt way to exposed.

"Is hundreds of coasts of make-up really necessary Rose?" I asked.

"Yes."

"What's the difference? It's all black and disturbing."

"Actually, this one is Charcoal, while this one is Jet Black."

"Well to me, they all the the same."

She rolled her eyes but continued to plaster me in make-up while all the other girls put on their outfits.

I felt like slut patrol could show up at the front door anytime and arrest me for many reasons, number one would be trying to be sexy, while number two along with the rest of them would be committing the crime of too much leather, make up, and so much g-d damn hoochiness.

I feel like the world biggest whore.

After Rose was done, Alice looked over all of us and nodded her head in satisfaction just as Edward walked in the door, his eyes wide as the roamed all the girl's bodies and then they stopped at mine and it looked like he couldn't breathe and his eyes were even wider then they were before.

If I have to dress like a slut for him to get my attention, that is going to piss me off royally. Why can't I get this reaction when I'm just me? All dolled up in jeans and a plaid shirt where leather is non-existent? Is that too dull? It's no wonder he agreed to be with Tanya. Isn't this similar to what she wore on a daily basis? I just don't think that this is the way to get a guy's attention and I certainly don't like that it makes Edward look at me differently. I'm just never going to be good enough for him. I refuse to dress like a hoe for him to really notice me...well it's more like he notices my microscopic boobs and flat ass.

"Umm...wow Alice. Good job."

"Thanks Edward, now leave." She giggled, pushing her brother out the door.

"I just came to say that it's 7:30 and I want to show you guys the room we made. Come take a look." He smirked.

We all followed Edward into his basement where the room looked like an everyday club. There were four black poles on a stage at the front of the room and bright lights shone in every direction. There were couches in front on the stage where the guys would sit and there was a little I-pod in the corner hooked up to some speakers. Black curtains hung from the ceiling and at the back left corner, there was a room where guys good take advantage of girls.

I won't be attending that room. Ever.

We waited in the basement and got familiar to the room...well the girls did and didn't try to hide it while I sat on the couch, sulking and completely regretting ever agreeing to this.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked, as he came to sit next to me, fairly close.

"I just don't get it. You couldn't think of a more practical way to get them back together?"

"I could have but this is more fun." He winked.

"This makes me feel dirty." I snorted.

"I'm exited, personally."

"What do you mean?"

"I want to see you take a chance and I want to see my best friend work the pole." He grinned crookedly.

The words I noticed were "best friend". That is all I'll ever be and it made me think about something. If I show Edward that there is some sensual about me and seductive...even if it does go against everything I thought of earlier...does that mean that he will stop seeing me as this "best friend" and more of someone who can work a pole and give a lap dance? As much as I hate to admit it I want him to see me differently now. I want Edward to want to kiss me. I just wish I didn't have to go this far. You'd think love has it's boundaries. Who ever said that is full of shit.

"We'll see." I smirked, and got up then walked away. There was nothing stopping me now.

Moments later, guys began to shuffle into the basement one by one and sit down on the couch while Lady Gaga blasted in the intense speakers. Soon, everyone had arrived and all of the girls were ready. Me...not so much.

As Three by Britney Spears began to play, I immediately wanted to call my dad and have him arrest Edward for making me do this, rip the beer out of the guys hands and make me a nice hot bath to scrub of all the dirt.

Drinking was so not my forte.

As each girl walk down the catwalk I began to feel adrenaline pump through me. Not in the way that makes me feel like "I can do anything if I just believe." Please. This was not a beauty paegent. More in the way that "This better make Edward think more highly of me." But then again...the words left my mind before I could catch them and change them back.

Although I'm scared shitless about walking out there and likely making a fool of myself, I attempted to asked calmly in what you would call "back stage." More like a really tight and cramped area where all of our leather scratched against one another and we could feel everyone's sticky breathe blowing across our faces. It took everything in me not to pull the tic-tac joke or barf.

But the space began to thin out as each girl walked out fiercely. I could actually point out Jessica and Rosalie behind the leather doing their walks because their struts were a lot better (professional in this situation, although professional isn't a word I should have used) than a lot of the other girls.

Eventually, I was the last one there, trying to feel the beat of the music all the way from in-between my toes to the roots of my hair.

I was never the most graceful person so there is a ninety-nine percent possibly that this could end very badly. Where is the caution sign when you need it?

I opened the two thick black curtains then pushed them out of my way and posed they way Alice showed me with my hands on my hips and my stance way to far apart that I'd consider it the splits.

Then, I began to walk down the stage and do two poses again at the end, pivoted around and went to go join the girls on the poles. I felt like a whore just walking over there, feeling my feet shake in my boots.

This is for Edward.

This is for Edward.

This is for Edward.

I continued to chant that as I strutted my way over to Alice and Angela's pole.

We each put our right hand on it and spun around one after another and then Alice began to take charge, winking at Jasper then began to grind the pole.

It took me two minutes and four seconds to realize pole dancing wasn't for me.

I backed away from Alice and her sexapeal and grabbed Angela and we danced together on stage when I saw Edward from my perphial vision.

I knew exactly what he was saying to me.

"Hey Angie?" I smiled at her, while dancing as well.

"Yeah?" She asked, breathless.

"I think you should go give Ben a lap dance." I told her, knowing this is what Edward wants to get the guys more involved.

"Only if you give Edward one." She bargained.

"No."

"Come on. I am not doing it if you don't."

"Angela Weber. I am already decked out in leather and Madonna boots, I refuse to tear what is left of my dignity."

"Then so do I." She smirked.

"Please." I begged.

"No Bella. If you don't, I don't. It's as simple as that."

Angela was never like this, she was always completely meek and willing to do whatever. It made me show her that I'm not a wimp and I can do this.

"Fine." I urged at her as I walked away from her dancing figure, off the stage and to where Edward was sitting next to Jasper and Emmett.

I took his hand and pulled him up onto the stage, then grabbed the other hand and wrapped it around my torso then braced myself for what I was about to do next.

I swayed my body with the rhythm of the music and began to grind against him, moving all the way to the floor then up again while his hands rubbed parts of my body I didn't have...and parts I'd never thought he would never ever touch. As I came back up the third time, I spun around him, hitched my leg over his waist and throwing my head back with a laugh. I'd scene so many movies where girls do this and I wonder how they did it with a straight face. I felt like a home wrecker.

I removed my legs from his body and then walked around so my stomach was pressed to his back and slowly placed my two hands on his chest and swiped them all down the front of his body. After that, I pressed my back against his and turned to see Ben and Angela heading for the secluded room in the corner, wishing it was me with Edward instead of her and Ben.

I saw the way Ben held her hand lovingly, and the way she made him smile as well as their affection for each other. He gripped her hand so tightly, afraid anyone would snatch her away and never wanting to let her go.

I wanted Edward to look at me that way, feel me that way and love me that way, despite what is all over my body. I wanted him to love me for me, not this.

I stepped away from Edward's body and he turned around, his eyes still wide like they were earlier, then I nodded once at him indicating I was done and left that room, the house, skidded into my car and drove home all in one swift movement.

As I lied on top of my covers, still decked out in that g-d awful leather, I prayed that Edward wouldn't come tonight. There was no reason for him to. You come because you care. Sure he cares, just not the way I want him to. I want him to look at me the way I look at him. The way Angela looks at Ben. The way Jazz looks at Alice. The way he looked at Tanya.

And that night, as my eyes fluttered closed and I drifted off to sleep, the thought that pondered in my head was the same one I had every night since I met Edward Cullen.

Why am I not good enough?


	7. Chapter 7

_**here...**_

Chapter 7

"Bella..." I heard the soft whisper say again. "Bella..." There it was drifting off over and over again.

"Hmm?" I hummed in response towards the voice.

"It's Edward, Bella. Wake up. I need to talk to you." It said.

I felt a tight grip on my shoulders, shaking me repeatedly and the movement rippled through my body causing me to jolt up, and my eyes open into the darkness.

I looked down at my body, sweating against the leather and sighed as the night flooded back into my memory. I got up off the bed and stood up to change.

"What time is it?" I asked him as I took my shoes of and aired out my feet.

"Three in the morning. Everyone left an hour ago and I rushed over to your house. You left." He accused.

I walked over to my closet and grabbed a baggy shirt from the top stack and walked into the washroom then changed. When I came out Edward was still there, leaning against my headboard.

"What?" I asked him bluntly.

"Why'd you leave? One second you were having so much fun and the next you're gone, just like that."

"Well obviously you know where to find me." I mumbled to myself.

He rolled his eyes and patted the spot next to him and I went to sit down. He put his arm around me and pulled me in. "I thought you were pretty amazing tonight." He smirked.

"Ugh." I groaned, trying to pull away from his strong embrace.

"What?"

"That is the thing Edward. I don't wanna have to dress like a slut to get your attention." Before I had time to think, the words slipped my mind. I wanted to take them back but it was too late.

"W-what?" He stuttered.

I thanked g-d that is was night time and he couldn't see my immense blush through the layers of darkness.

"N-nothing. Forget I said anything."

"No. What do you mean?"

"Just go Edward. You'll be saving me a lot of time and embarrassment if you just leave and pretend this conversation, last night including all the other nights you've come here, never happened."

"Why?"

"Because it _kills_ me that you come here." I admitted. "Why do you even do it?"

"Because I like seeing you." He said, just like that.

"That isn't good enough!" I shouted at him.

"Well what do you want me to say?" He yelled back at me.

"That you care about me and for me, that you've been doubting your feelings for me or something along that line. That maybe, you think we could be something more and could see yourself having the slightest bit of attraction for me despite my lack of tits and ass or the dull colour of my hair and eyes. I love being your friend but that is all I ever see myself as and I feel you see me the exact same way. Just the freaking friend. I hated having to do what you made me do tonight and then, when you said you wanted to see me work the pole, I got even more angry. I am _not_ Tanya and I felt like a whore wearing that outfit!" I screamed, pointing at the floor where the scraps of leather remained. "But do you know why I did it? Because I am completely and utterly, insanely, and madly in love with you."

I took deep breathes to calm myself, and closed my eyes. That felt amazing, getting all of that off my chest but at the same time, was it the right thing to do? We'll he think it is always going to be awkward now between us and we'll slowly drift apart as he deals with his life and I deal with mine? Because if that is how it's going to be, he should just walk away now and spare me some of the agony I'll have to face.

I could hear his body get up from the bed and I thought I was going to hear him descending from my room, but instead I heard his shoes stomp against my old, wooded floor towards me and all of a sudden, my red cheeks were in his large palms and a pair of lips were pressed against mine.

Wait...his lips were pressed against mine.

Edward Cullen was kissing me.

I was kissing Edward Cullen.

No one pinch me.

His lips were soft, moist and warm, like every night before he goes to bed he'd swipe them with Vaseline. His hands knitted into the bottom roots of my teased wavy hair as my petite arms wrapped around his neck, pulling his mouth closer onto mine as I kissed him back. Each soft peck was tender and romantic at first as we gently sucks on each others lips over and over again My arms moved down his broad chest then wrapped around his waist. But then, I felt his wet and hot tongue graze my bottom lip and I allowed him to kiss me deeply, as we explored each others mouths wildly.

I never ever thought this would happen to me. Who knew addmitting your feelings would make a guy respond like this?

When his hand's had had enough in my hair, the trailed down the sides of my body, over the baggy shirt and down to my thighs where my bare skin shone, making it's way onto my ass, which was covered by a little thin piece of underwear.

I moved my hands into his bronze hair and knotted them in good, hoping they'd never have to leave, arching my back and pulling his mouth thoroughly into mine.

We continued kissing each other when his feet began to trail towards the bed, pulling me along so I followed. His back pressed against my old, ripped duvet as I straddled on top of him while leaning down to kiss his thin lips against and again until he pulled away to have a breather.

"Bella..." I heard his breathless voice. "As much as you might kill me for saying this, that outfit you have on right now is the sexiest thing I've ever seen you wear and I love the bare legs. Also, when I saw you for the first time in that leather outfit...my thoughts weren't the cleanest." He smirked. "But...that isn't the first time I've had dirty thoughts about you."

"Really?" I asked in disbelief.

"Really. You are as sexy as hell."

"Was this before or after you dated Tanya?" I murmured.

"Since I met you. So...before, during, and after."

"So then why did you go for Tanya if you liked me?" I questioned.

"Come on Bella, I never thought you'd even think of me as 'your type'."

"Are you freaking insane?" I inquired.

"I guess so." He smiled, pulling my lips to his for another quick kiss. Or it was supposed to be one but we both elongated it, of course.

When we pulled away, it was my turn to say something. "Edward?"

"Hmm?"

"I think you are the sexiest man on earth and I am completely in love with you and even fantasize about you and I don't usually have dirty thoughts during the day but in my dreams...let's just say they are more than PG13." I laughed.

He chuckled with me and pressed his lips to mine again, again, again, and again. I loved how it was instinctive and easy though. There was no hesitating, no second guessing...it just flowed.

And for the first time, as I fell asleep in Edward's arms my thoughts were a lot different than they usually were.

Now I feel as though I'm good enough.

The last thing I heard before finally drifting off to sleep was four words escaping from Edward's lips. "I love you too."

_**ya ya ya...i know this is getting to be more and more and more than be no more but this is simply a remedy. It probably wont be that long seeing as bella isnt a wimp in this story**_

_**loving you**_

**_xoxoxo_**

**_NikCul_**


End file.
